Sunday, September 23, 2012

Another Look at Mendocino

We arrive at our next stop in Mendocino California after traveling through the beautiful northern California coastline.  The Pacific Ocean is the setting for this stop honoring Kathy LaMadrid and David Neily, the setting and scene so very different from yesterday's stop yet hauntingly the same in so many ways.

While every missing persons story is different; what happened before that life changing day and what has happened since, the story and circumstances ever evolving and changing, that level of longing and that feeling of loss is the same for all.

As Shelli LaMadrid begins to speak I see the word hope standing up on the table behind her and I know that is what keeps her going. She has taken all this on in a most proactive way and listening to her speak it is clear she will not stop until their is resolution and answers. Shelli's perseverance has been unwavering since Kathy disappeared in 2004 and that is clear in what she does for others in the world of the missing. I am drawn in and feel as if I know Kathy as Shelli speaks about her and her big heart and fun loving ways. As I stand listening to Shelli I hear voices within myself asking how do you continue to do what you do for your sister all these years later?  The answer is the same for me as for Shelli; it is love and very simply how could I not?

Ryan Neily gets up and begins to share the story of his father and himself. Getting the word out for for this family has been extremely difficult and listening to Ryan speak you can hear that the pain
is as fresh today as when his dad went missing in 2006. Suspicious circumstances surround his disappearance  and all that weighs heavy on his family. I hear Ryan say that he wonders what he could have done differently, what if his father had listened to him? It is then that I remember my own feelings of guilt in Allison's case and my constant asking what if? I think many of us on this journey feel the same way. That is why the events of this Road Tour are so important to be a part of, they help us to see that we are not alone in our thoughts and feelings.

I continue to be amazed at how just simply showing up for a family makes a huge difference. It really is just that simple, showing someone you care and have not forgotten goes a long way. I have always believed that actions speak louder than words and that is exactly what this Tour is about.....Action, being proactive and not giving up.

I leave this stop a little different than when I arrived, how could I not, how could anybody not? Back on the van and on to the next stop and I know that these people I meet and the stories of their missing loved ones will stay with me and continue to impact my life.
Lisa Valentino 

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